This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "SpongeHenge" from season 5, which aired on November 23, 2007.

• [Episode begins with a shot of Bikini Bottom. Wind blows wildly]
• Incidental 41: Neptune's stirred up quite a gale tonight. He must be mad about something.
• Judy: [laughing] That's silly. Everyone knows Poseidon is ruler of the undersea. [bag of goulash blows out of Judy's hand] Oh. My leftovers.
• Incidental 41: No! [sobs] Why, dear Neptune?! [SpongeBob snores. Bag of goulash breaks through the window and lands on SpongeBob's face]
• SpongeBob: Mmmm-mmmm. Goulash. [SpongeBob opens window] Hey, out there! You dropped your goulash! Hello? [wind makes music through SpongeBob's pores] My pores are whistling in the wind. [SpongeBob jumps outside. SpongeBob makes music and laughs. Jellyfish comes to SpongeBob] Hahahahaha! That tickles! [Jellyfish buzzes to music] Aww. The little critter likes my whistling pores. [Jellyfish goes into SpongeBob's head. SpongeBob laughs uncontrollably] That tickles! [laughs until a voice attracts his attention. SpongeBob looks up to see the moon with a real human's face on it.]
• Moon: [yawning] My shift's over.
• [The scene cuts to daytime, with the sun having a human face on it as well.]
• Sun: Time for work, SpongeBob.
• SpongeBob: All right, Jelly, out you go. [he takes a deep breath, and shoots the jellyfish out from one of the holes in his head.] It's been real fun, but I gotta get to work. [jellyfish follows] Quite a wind this morning, eh, Jelly? [wind blows SpongeBob away] Whoa! [more jellyfish come] Hey, Sparky, can you tell your friends I don't have time to play right now? [the jellyfish tickles SpongeBob, SpongeBob laughs uncontrollably] Hahaha! No, please! Stop it! Please stop! [continues laughing, until SpongeBob lets go of the rocks] Whoa! [SpongeBob lands back in bed] Oh! I'm going to be late! [SpongeBob runs out the door. Jellyfish pick him up] I told you guys, I don't have time to play! [SpongeBob gets blown back] I have not been tardy one time in my career as a fry cook, and I'm not going to start today! [SpongeBob gets slung out of his home and back]
• Jellyfish: Hahaha! [Door closes on SpongeBob's hands. SpongeBob screams, fingers are huge]
• SpongeBob: I need to call in some help. [tries, but his swollen fingers are too big] My fingers are too big for the buttons. [dials with his nose and calls The Krusty Krab]
• Mr. Krabs: Hello, this be the Krusty Krab.
• SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs! I need you!
• Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! Where you been? Customers are blowin' in here like nobody's business! [shows Incidental 41 flying through the door [literally] and lands on his face, then gets in line]
• SpongeBob: I am sorry, Mr. Krabs, but these jellyfish don't want me to go to work!
• Mr. Krabs: Jellyfish?
• SpongeBob: They're attracted to my whistley holes.
• Mr. Krabs: Uh, I'll never understand what you just said. But if it's transportation you need, I know just the thing. [Mr. Krabs casts a fishing rod which hooks onto SpongeBob by one of his pores] Gotcha! Hmm? Ooh, this one's puttin' up a fight. [SpongeBob is dragging on the ground] It's fightin' too hard! [shows SpongeBob getting tossed in the air] If you're gonna reel him in, Krabs, you gotta wear him down. Give him a little slack, [SpongeBob blows back a little] then yank! [SpongeBob is pulled hard] Give a little slack, then yank! [pulls a beaten-up SpongeBob in] There he is. Ready for work. [he puts SpongeBob's hat on his head. One by one, his teeth fall out of SpongeBob's mouth] Draw back the point, now get in there and start pushing out them patties.
• SpongeBob: [saluting dazedly] Aye aye, sir. [his left arm falls off. Now in the kitchen, SpongeBob walks over to his grill] Let's get these patties started right! Wooooh![wind blows patties onto the walls] That gives me an idea. [lets all ingredients blow from his hands onto the patties on the walls]
• SpongeBob: Order up! [humming] Ooh, hoohoo! [The window opens and then sound comes through SpongeBob's pores again] Oh no. They've found me. [the jellyfish come in through the chimney, towards SpongeBob] No, no, no, guys, please! Uh, would you mind coming back after business hours? Heh, I'm trying to work here.
• [As the wind continues, the Krusty Krab gets blown off into the sky, leaving the green floorboards behind. SpongeBob held onto his spatula in the floorboards, as Squidward slides past him in his wooden boat. Mr. Krabs steps backward, protecting his cash register. SpongeBob loses his grip in the Krusty Krab floorboards and he is sent launching through the air. SpongeBob is then seen landing on Patrick's rock and he grabs onto the weather vane, hanging on for dear life as the heavy wind continues blowing.]
• Weatherman: The weather situation is much worse across the country.
• Bob: And this doesn't look like the winds are going to stop anytime soon... [TV reporter gets blown away]
• Patrick: [laughing] Fishy go bye-bye. [eats kelp cream, SpongeBob enters and falls]
• Barbara: And that's the way it is in "Your World Today." [Patrick throws the ice cream cone at his TV]
• Patrick: Boring! I don't want to watch any of this boring stuff. I wanna watch something decent, like--
• SpongeBob: Sorry, Patrick. I need a place to hide from those jellyfish.
• Patrick: What jellyfish?
• SpongeBob: Ever since the wind started, a sound whistles through my holes that the jellyfish seem to love. [Patrick's rock opens and jellyfish come in]
• Patrick: Hey, pal. [jellyfish stings Patrick] Owww! [Angry] SpongeBob, get out of here! [jellyfish blow him away] I'm sorry, SpongeBob, but you've become a negative influence!
• SpongeBob: [laughing] At least the wind stopped. [jellyfish sting SpongeBob. SpongeBob hides in cave] I think I lost them. Well, I guess I should just stay here where it's safe... and quiet... and dark. It's okay. I'll only hide out here here for a second. Yeah, it shouldn't take long. Behind these rocks. These sedentary, lifeless rocks.
• French Narrator: Later...
• SpongeBob: [SpongeBob is sitting together with an exact stone replica of himself] Hey, buddy. Just thought I'd spruce you up a little. Auh-what's that? Oh, you don't say. Well, guess what. You're my best friend too. Mmm-hmm. Come on, let's have some fun. Look, buddy, Dinner's ready. Here, let's have some tea. Want some sugar, buddy? Hmm? One lump or two? Oh, you can have it all. [puts all the sugar in the tea] I feel comfortable around you. [sugar crumble in mouth] Can I confess something? Cause I know you'll understand. I have this problem. I seem to attract jellyfish! Hahahaha! How do you handle a thing like that, hmm? [SpongeBob stone stays still] Yeah, yeah. I'm in a loss, too. Oh, barnacles. I'm gonna be stuck in this cave forever! [sighs. SpongeBob's stone replica pores make music as the wind blows through] Of course, buddy. Brilliant idea! [SpongeBob takes stone outside] We'll see what happens this time. [jellyfish come] Whoa, here they come! Go get 'em, buddy! [jellyfish hate the music and buzz over to SpongeBob] Hey, guys. Long time no see. Uh, what do you think about my little friend's song? [SpongeBob's stone replica continues to plays foul notes] ...Something wrong? [jellyfish sting SpongeBob. SpongeBob runs back to cave] Hmm. I created one stone SpongeBob that uttered a note in a foul key. But if I were to craft another in a different size, [pulls down extremely complicated equation on a blackboard] the dimensions of that hollow center, multiplied by the number of holes, may offer another tune. One that could soothe those jellyfish. But which one is the right size?! Eh. I guess I'll just have to make a bunch of them. [SpongeBob makes the eight musical stones] Okay, that should do 'er. [SpongeBob stones produce melodious notes in the breeze] Whoa. It actually worked. Ah, they're finally leaving me alone. I can go back to work now! [laughs and runs back to Bikini Bottom] Krusty Krab, here I come! [SpongeBob gasps and stops running] How long was I gone?! [SpongeBob finds Krusty Krab partially buried in sand] No! No! [cries desperately]
• French Narrator: 3,000 years later...
• [The three aliens and their guide float down to SpongeBob's stone statues]
• Alien: To this day, no one knows why these mysterious statues were created, or by whom. [One alien takes a picture with its mouth] All we know is the genius of their design has caused the annual migration of jellyfish to their wondrous tune. [jellyfish come and go in and out of the pores of the SpongeBob stone statues. Off in the distance, SpongeBob laughs as the camera pans into one of the statue's mouths]